Dear blog, did I neglect you this week? Yes. Do I care a lot about it? Noooooo. Things to do, dogs to walk.

I removed the shellac two days ago and my nails are amazingly long and LUXURIANT. I guess taking an entire month off from the shellac was badly needed! I can’t decide what shellac to do next, so in the meantime this is my version of a “bare” nail.

So hey! We are finally jumping aboard the IVF train! It’s been long enough, dudes. I went off birth control in December of 2009, since around Fall of 2010 we’ve been giving it a pretty good go. I mean, not EVERY cycle, that would be lame, but many many many cycles. I’ve had Clomid 6 times, I’ve had 3 rounds of IUI, and we’ve taken every damn vitamin and tried every damn position and RELAXED (God that little piece of advice is the WORST) and had ultrasounds and semen analyses and blue dye inserted hither and thither…

…yes, we’ve put in the time and the $ and now it’s time to put in some more time and lots of $ and make a Robo Baby. I’m not ashamed! I’m excited about it! Because dammit, I want the FULL EXPERIENCE.

Here’s a brief list of rude things to not say to someone considering IVF:

1. How much does it cost? (A LOT)
2. Why don’t you just adopt? (RUDE RUDE RUDE LIKE WE HAVEN’T THOUGHT OF THAT UGH)
3. Maybe it’s “God’s Plan” that you don’t have a baby? (NOPE)

So yesterday morning me and my blue-haired husband went down to the (highly recommended) fertility clinic and met with the (highly recommended) doc and started a slew of blood and hormone and thyroid and STD and God knows what else tests. I also had another ultrasound. I had sort of anticipated that they would want to get down to business right away, so I trimmed in anticipation! Aren’t you glad you stopped by this blog today?

There’s a lot of tests and 10 days of horrible shots with lots of raging hormones (poor Josh) and there’s going to be LOTS of genetic testing for weirdness (I insisted, even though at the fertility clinic I’m still considered young–YOUNG!) and then freezing and the whole shebang is gonna kick off in January. This is if all goes well, mind you.

I would certainly appreciate any well wishes, good vibes, prayers and candles lit. I do not appreciate any more b.s. as stated above. I have been trying to get pregnant for half a decade of my life: I HAVE HEARD IT ALL, and 70% of it I do not want to hear any longer.

Alright, got that out of the way, now look at the latest Mandala! Isn’t it pretty pretty? I had no real direction with this one, still don’t, just sort of going with the flow while re-watching “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” for the 2942942th time. I love that show. It’s awful.

You would not believe it, but I actually resisted buying this amazing fuchsia glitter duct tape recently. I knooooow. Gotta save money for Robo Baby!

This lipgloss looks a-maze-ing in the bottle but so boring on bare lips. I need to try it over dark lipstick to make it really POP.

“No more buying make-up,” Josh informed me, as part of our new Saving $ for Robo Baby Plan.

“NO MORE BUYING BOOZE,” I replied helpfully, but he ignored me. Heigh ho. I told him I’d be willing to cut my coffee intake down to the clinic recommended 2 cups a day if he would cut his daily beer intake down to 2 beers…never quite got the “yes” on that one.

“Drink iced beer!” I suggested. “Higher alcohol percentage for less!” I mean seriously.

I bought some happy little wooden hearts to do some heart-shaped Mandalas next. I love it when the ideas are flowing!

Toodles blog, I’m off to the basement to throw some paint on a canvas.